I invite you to release your mind’s wants and needs, should be's and what there is to fix, to have what you want. Then listen for what there is to know about what you need to be fulfilled and happy. As you do this what you want will emerge and unfold from the part of you that is not here to fix your life but is here to have you create what you want, including your relationship.
Create a new context for the relationships in your life: being in a relationship allows you to discover where the Mind keeps you separate and removed. When something happens where you feel disconnected from love, take a moment to reflect on what the Mind is saying about what is occurring. What ‘truths’ are being evoked from the Mind? It’s in this new awareness that you can disengage the Mind’s conversation about what is happening to see the situation differently.
The Mind has created an illusion of what ‘love’ means; this is playing out in your relationships as a measure of how much or how little you experience being loved by another. From your Self ‘love’ has no measure. There is only releasing the Mind to discover that - you are loved.
The Mind assesses and defines the type of person you want: their qualities, looks, etc. The Mind generates these thoughts when things aren’t going well in your relationship. It begins to use the relationship you are in as a measure of what you don’t have that you want or need. In this awareness you can shift into appreciating your partner exactly as they are.
A relationship gives us the opportunity to discover how our Mind keeps us separate and removed. When we can have our Self define what there is to honor in our relationship we find ourselves experiencing a new level of Connectedness and Oneness where true intimacy arises.